Halloween Cullen Style
by HollyElphie96
Summary: We all know about the normal Halloween, but what will happen when the twilight characters get in on the action?
1. Mom?

Disclaimer: If I owned the right's to Twilight, would I be writing this to go on fan fiction?

Nessie POV

As I walked towards my Auntie Alice's Porsche, I thought again about the conversation I had overheard. Three of the students from school were discussing what to do on Halloween.

I pondered back, to the years that had passed. My family had never celebrated Halloween before. In fact, it had never even been discussed in our household. I wondered why. I decided to ask about it later.

As I got into the car, Auntie Alice beamed at me. "That's a great idea Nessie!"

"What is?" I looked at her, confused.

"Well I just had a vision of you asking Edward about Halloween."

"Oh." I thought about asking Daddy about Halloween. I would have to choose a time to ask him. Maybe when he was playing his piano, he was calmest then and most willing to talk.

"You should have Bella there. She'll help I'm sure. She used to love Halloween, it was her favourite holiday because no had give her any gifts." Auntie Alice was already pulling out of the parking lot at an alarming speed.

"Auntie, you may want to slow down!" I gripped the dashboard for support.

She looked at the speedometer and took her foot of the accelerator and we slowed down minutely.

"Don't you think we should slow down a little more?" I looked at her pleadingly.

"You know Nessie; you're just like your mother! Always abiding by the traffic laws!"

I watched as the speedometer needle shot right down to 50 mph. I breathed a sigh of relief.

We pulled into the long driveway of our home, and I looked around to see who else was home. Daddy's Volvo was here, as was Auntie Rose's BMW. Mom's car and both of my uncle's vehicles were here. Grandpa's Mercedes wasn't there, so he must still be at the hospital.

Auntie Alice pulled into the garage and parked the car. I grabbed my backpack from by my feet as I jumped out of the Porsche. I could hear shouts coming from the front room so I went to investigate.

When I arrived, I could see Uncle Jazz and Uncle Em, on the floor, playing some sort of war game. I could hear Uncle Jazz muttering something about strategizing under his breath while Uncle Em was just shooting anything that moved. Even members of his own team.

"Emmett, you'll never win that way. Hello Nessie." Auntie Rose was sitting on the sofa, reading a magazine.

"Hey, Auntie Rose. Where are Mom and Daddy?" I went to give her a quick hug.

"Bella is down at the cottage and Edward is hunting. Be careful going down there."

"Sure, sure." I saw Auntie Rose grimace at my choice of words. She still hadn't accepted Jake properly. I said hi to Grandma before I left.

I ran quickly to the cottage. I laughed as I ran; just like Daddy I loved to run. I arrived at the cottage and I threw open the door.

"Mom? Mom?" I couldn't hear anything coming from anywhere in the house. I ran through the rooms looking for her. It was strange, why would she leave without telling anyone?

I could smell the faint scents of Daddy, Mom, Seth and Jake. But for some reason, Seth's scent was strongest. He hadn't been over in a week at least.

My eye saw something lying on the table. I went over and picked it up. It was a letter.

I read it quickly.

_Cullens,_

_If you want to see Bella again, you will have to do what we tell you. Wait for us to contact you and tell you our wishes._

_Love from _

_Seth_

_Kidnapper_

I ran back to the main house to show them the letter. When I got back Grandpa was there as well. Everyone crowded around to see what the matter was

When everyone had read the letter, Uncle Jasper shot up.

"This means war!"

Grandpa held up his hand. "Jasper, we know who has Bella and we can get her back quite easily."

"What do you mean 'we know who has Bella'? Where is she?!" And right on cue, Daddy, the pinnacle of the overreaction, arrived on the scene.

"Edward, stay calm." Grandpa went to put his hands on Daddy's shoulders.

Daddy took in a deep breath. "Ok. So what's happened?"

"Well the wolf pack appear to have kidnapped Bella." Uncle Emmett was now out of his seat, next to the phone and ready to demand we get Mom back.

"The...wolf pack? Are you sure?" Daddy came and sat next to me on the sofa as I handed him the letter. "'Love from Seth' Ok, now I believe that it was the wolf pack. Only they would be stupid enough to sign a ransom note 'love from' and then their name."

Just then the phone started to ring. Uncle Emmett was closest and so he grabbed the phone.

"GIVE US BELLA BACK AND NOBODY GETS HURT!" Uncle Emmett was shouting down the phone and I felt sorry for who ever was on the other end; even if they did have my mom.

Daddy held out his hand for the phone and Uncle Em handed it to him.

"Jacob." I was close enough to the phone to hear Jake's response.

"Edward."

"Give me back my wife, before I come and rip your arms off." Daddy's face was perfectly serious and his tone was calm. I glared at him.

"Hey, it wasn't my idea, bloodsucker."

I grabbed the phone out of Daddy's hand.

"Jacob, bring her back. I thought the whole point of imprinting was to make me happy. Do I sound happy?!" I growled at Jacob in my scariest voice, but I could almost see his smile on the other end of the phone. I had had imprinting explained to me a little while back, and now I was hoping to use it to my advantage.

_Daddy, help me out here!_

I held the phones receiver next to Daddy's mouth as he growled, menacingly, for me.

"Ok, I get the picture. We only want to have a friendly competition."

"And that included kidnapping MY WIFE?!" Daddy's mouth was still by the receiver and he shouted at Jake.

"Yep. We wanted to have a Halloween party and we wanted to invite you, but we figured that the only way you'd come would be if you had to. So we took Bella. Don't worry, she's fine-"

Jake was cut off by a scream of annoyance. "JACOB BLACK I WILL KILL YOU FOR THIS AND I MEAN IT!"

Only one person could scream like that, and it was my mom. Well at least she was alright.

"Bella? Love, are you there?" Daddy grabbed the phone again and started pacing around the room.

"EDWARD ANTHONY MASEN CULLEN HELP ME GET AWAY FROM THESE DOGS!" I saw Daddy wince.

"Of course dear-wait, Bella, when did you learn my full name?" Daddy looked suspiciously at my Uncles, who both started whistling and looking at anyone but my dad.

"ASK YOUR BROTHERS! NOW HURRY UP!"

Somewhere in the background we could here someone making the noise you always heard in cowboy and Indian films. I heard someone hit the person because they stopped and said, "Ow!"

"Shut up, Seth!" I heard Leah hiss at her brother.

"No, Leah, it's a good idea!" Jacob obviously had his hand over the phone as he talked to his pack. "Hey, Cullens, fancy a game of cowboys and Indians?"

Uncle Em grabbed the phone and before one of us could shout 'no' he had greed to Jake's demand. "You bet! Don't worry Bella the cavalries comin'!"

Then he slammed the phone down.

A/N: I'm back! With yet another story! But don't worry every body, I haven't given up on 'The Cullen's Story' or 'Funny Twilight Stuff' they've just been put on hold for a little.

Review, review, review!


	2. I'm Not Wearing That!

Disclaimer: If I was Stephenie Meyer, this wouldn't be on here; it would be a book and it would selling millions.

Alice POV

I ran straight to the back of the house and started up all six computers. I was soon looking for the perfect Wild West outfits for us all.

I heard a smack as Rosalie hit Emmett for agreeing to the wolves plan. Edward wouldn't let Nessie out of his sight, in case one of the pack came to kidnap her as well. Jasper had laid out maps of the local area, devising a plan on the best line of attack.

"Right, we all need codenames." Jasper was straight back into his military training. "Edward: Broody, Carlisle: Doc, Esme: Gardener, Emmett: Dopey, Rosalie: Blondie, Alice: Happy, and myself: Major."

"Why is my husband named 'Dopey'?" Rosalie had her hand on her hips.

"Rosalie, this is _Emmett_ we're talking about." Jasper rolled his eyes.

"I guess you're right." Rosalie shrugged and sat back down.

Emmett stood up. "What about Nessie?"

"NO!" Edward jumped up. "She isn't getting involved!"

"Don't worry, Daddy, I'm Switzerland." Nessie stayed sitting down.

"Forget it, you're getting involved! This is for your mother, Renesmee Carlie Cullen!"

Carlisle and Esme were standing in the middle of the floor, mouths hanging open. Carlisle was the first to talk. "Don't you think...that you're all going a little too far?"

It was silent. I ran to stand in front of Carlisle. My words came out in a low hiss. "Carlisle, this isn't just about Bella. This is about family pride!"

There were cheers from across the room. I went back to shopping at the back of the room.

"Daddy?" Nessie had curled into Edward's side, a skill she had learned from me. She was about to get her way with her father once again. Cullen Family charm.

"Yes, Nessie?" Edward wrapped his arms around her.

"Why don't we normally celebrate Halloween?" Nessie looked up at Edward, making her eyes wide.

"Ah." Was Edward's genius response. "Well you see..."

Carlisle answered. "You see, Nessie, every time this family has celebrated Halloween, certain people," Carlisle looked at Edward, Emmett and Jasper; who, when his eyes landed on them, ducked their heads, "have gotten a little too enthusiastic about it and ended up in jail."

Nessie looked at her father, shocked. "Were you in _jail_, Daddy?"

Edward would have been bright red, if possible. "Well, I-err...I...Don't tell your mother!"

Rosalie snorted. "Trying to keep your perfect image, Edward?"

"Like you've never been in jail, Rosalie." Edward leant forward, pulling his daughter onto his lap.

"Yes, but I was never made to stay there over night." Rosalie crossed her arms and leant back onto Emmett.

"Stop it you two! We have work to do!" Jasper had made a complete strategy plan for us to get Bella back. We all went to sit around the dining room table.

"Right, so-" Jasper started to speak, but he was interrupted by Emmett.

"Can I have a gun?"

"NO!" Everyone around the room shouted at the same time.

"A paint gun?"

"No!" Esme shouted this time. "Don't you remember the Paint Ball Incident of 1984?"

Nessie looked quizzically at Edward. "I'll tell you later, Ness." Edward whispered.

"A bow and arrow?" Emmett's tone was hopeful.

"No, remember the time you dressed up as Robin Hood and ended up somehow shattering all of the glass in the house?" Carlisle shuddered at the memory.

"Well, if I can't have any of those, can I have a horse?"

"Emmett," I started slowly, "Where would we get a horse from?"

"Em, I love you, but the only weapons you're allowed to wield are the ones on the games console." We all gave Rosalie a thankful look. Emmett sat back, pouting, and we all turned back to Jasper.

"_Anyway_, this is the plan..." Jasper proceeded to tell us the plan. My husband was a genius.

_Meanwhile..._

Bella POV

"I hate you, Jacob Black." I hissed at him from the chair they had chained me to. I had tried and tried to get out of it, but to no avail. I remember the last time I had spoken those words to him. I had just broken my hand after Jacob had kissed me. He had just laughed and said that that was good, hate was a passionate emotion. I had replied with a death threat. But it was much more likely now that I would be able to kill him.

He laughed. "I know Bella, I know."

"When are you planning on letting me go?" I glared at him as he lounged on the sofa on the other side of the cellar they were holding me in.

"When the Cullens agree to our game." Jacob's head was lolling off of the one end of the sofa and his feet off of the other. Soon his eyes were drooping and he was asleep and snoring like chainsaw. Great, Edward had better arrive soon.

Suddenly the door burst open and Seth walked in; dressed like a Red Indian, body paint and all. He even had a feather in his hair.

I laughed. "Seth, why are you dressed like that?"

Seth took something out from behind his back. It was an old fashioned dress, something that looked like it was from a Wild West movie. I stopped laughing.

"I will never wear that. Ever."

I was focusing on Seth so much, that when Jacob snored again, I jumped. Seth laughed.

Two hours later, and a lot of protests from me, I was in the dress. It was a deep blue and had ruffles. Edward would probably like it.

Jacob snored again. I went over and poked his arm. He moved slightly. I picked him up and threw him across the room and he hit Seth with a satisfying thunk. Jacob was instantly awake and cursing at Seth who had landed on top of Jacob when they rolled over on top of each other.

I dusted off my hands and smiled. Maybe this could be fun...

A/N: Thank you Zoe, who reviewed the last chapter! Reviews make a happy author and a happy author makes faster updates! *Hint hint*

Holly xxx


	3. The Cullen's Get Their Costumes!

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight, because of I did then this would be selling millions and I would be relaxing on a beach somewhere. But I'm not.

A/N: Sorry for the long wait between updates, I've been very busy. Sort of.

Jasper POV

I carried on adding to our ingenious plan, as Alice went to collect something from the van that had pulled up outside the house.

Eventually everyone was here minus the obvious (Bella). Edward still had Nessie on his back, human-Bella-style. Nessie had been protesting, but shut up Edward gave her 'the look'. The one that could scare even Emmett. Nessie stayed pretty quiet after that.

Suddenly Alice burst from the front porch holding a box so big, all I could of her was her feet. She started running around giving everyone smaller boxes, containing their costumes. When she came to me I started giving her puppy dog eyes.

"Please Alice; don't make me wear that thing. My uniform is still in one piece upstairs, couldn't I wear that instead?" Her eyes narrowed at me.

"Jasper Whitlock Hale." I winced at Alice's growling voice. She had used my full name, this wasn't good. "You will wear this, it matches with everyone else and no you can't wear that...that thing that you insist on bringing with us every time we move!"

I cringed away from my tiny wife and muttered, "Yes, Alice."

Alice smiled brightly and kissed my cheek. "Thank you, Jasper." Then she skipped off to go and give Rosalie her outfit. Rosalie was currently making sure that all of the cars were in perfect condition; as we may need getaway vehicles, should my brilliant plan not go...well, according to plan, I guess.

I walked over to collect the box that Alice had left a few feet in front of me.

"Going back to your roots with this outfit, huh Jasper?" Emmett started laughing, as if what he had said was remotely funny. Edward started snickering, but I shot him a wave of fear so he would stop. I turned my glare to Emmett.

"Emmett, why would I have worn this," I gestured to the cowboy outfit I had pulled from the box, "In my human life? I lived in Texas, not the Wild West!"

Emmett continued to laugh. "Well, you never know!" He gasped out between his fits of laughing.

I stomped upstairs to go and get changed. I walked into the closet Alice and I shared and went to my section, which was blessedly smaller compared to Alice's. I think her section had an escalator and an arcade the last time I checked, a year ago. I didn't go in there often; I tended to get lost and spend weeks in there, trying to get out.

Once I was changed, I left a certain part of the costume in the box. I walked back downstairs, only to be greeted by Alice's finger pointing back up the stairs. I turned around and ran back up, to the box and picked up the offensive _thing _that was in it.

"Please Alice; don't make me, please?" I pleaded with my wife, holding the object in my hands.

"Jasper..." Alice grabbed the hat out of my hands and shoved it on to my head. I walked sullenly into the living room and I flopped on to the sofa. Emmett came down next and I looked over at him and found myself unable to look away. I blinked once and then burst out laughing. As well as the cowboy outfit, around his midsection was a stuffed horse; the kind that small children would strap on and pretend to ride it.

Emmett spread his arms wide. "Well, what do you think?"

I continued to laugh. "I think that you look like an idiot. Where did you get that thing?"

Emmett pouted slightly. "It was in my box."

Just then Alice, Rosalie and Esme walked in. Alice was in a buttercup yellow dress, that if I remembered correct, I had bought her a good few years back. Rosalie was wearing a blood red dress, and Esme was wearing an emerald green outfit.

Alice walked over to Emmett. "He wanted a horse, and so I bought him one."

"For goodness sake Emmett, take that thing off." Rosalie glided over to sit on the opposite sofa to the one I was on.

Carlisle and Edward and Nessie still hadn't reappeared. Suddenly we heard a shout from upstairs. "I DON'T WANT TO PICK A SIDE! I AM SWITZERLAND!"

"NESSIE! COME OUT OFF THERE!" Edward's shout echoed through the house.

"ONLY IF YOU LET ME WEAR A FEATHER IN MY HAIR! PLEASE DADDY!" I heard Edward sigh.

"OK!" I don't think that Edward had realised that Nessie also had super-sensitive ears, just like the rest of us.

Nessie came down soon after in a lilac dress that matched her aunts and grandmother's dresses perfectly. And in her hair was a bright red feather. She came and sat next to me beaming.

"Where's Edward and Carlisle?" Rosalie leant forward.

Nessie's brow furrowed. "I think they're hiding in Grandpa's study."

"Right. Esme I need you." Rosalie stood up and marched towards the stairs and Esme followed afterwards.

There was a few seconds of yelps and scuffling sounds before Esme and Rosalie were dragging Carlisle and Edward downstairs by their collars. I gave them a sympathetic look.

"At least you tried." Carlisle fell into a chair and Edward ran over to where Nessie was sat.

Then the phone started ringing.

"Hello?" I barked into the phone. It had been decided that I was the official negotiator.

"Jasper?" Came the whispered reply. "It's me, Bella."

Edward then came over, grabbed the phone and put in on loud speaker.

"Bella? Are you alright?" Edward leant closer to the phone, as if he would be closer to Bella.

"I'm fine. I managed to steal Jacob's cell while he was asleep. Again." I could picture Bella rolling her eyes. She was still whispering, but luckily we could still hear her.

"Where are you Bella?" I thought that it would be a good idea to ask something that would help us get her back.

"I don't know." She hissed sourly. "They blindfolded me. I can't-" Suddenly there was a scuffling sound and the line went dead. The werewolves had gotten to the phone.

Edward was looking dejected. Esme rubbed his shoulder. "We'll get her back."

Just then there was a knocking on the door and Emmett went to open it. There on the doorstep was...Sam.

"I've come to join your side." And then Emmett slammed the door in his face.

A/N: DUN DUN DUUUUN! What will happen next? Review and I will try and write it tomorrow!

Review! Review! Review!

Holly xxx


	4. Coming To The Rescue!

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight.

Sam POV

As soon as the big vamp slammed the door in my face, I heard a chorus of, "EMMETT!"

Then the door opened again and this time I was met by Nessie. "Hi, Sam, come in."

She led me into the living room, which was full of the Cullens sitting around in cowboy costumes. I stifled back a laugh, as I thought about what I might have been forced into and then I shuddered. I saw out of the corner of my eye, Edward shuddered too. I guess that he had read my mind.

"So, what brings you here?" The blond one...Jasper stood up from the couch and walked over to me, with a suspicious look in his eyes. It was quite frightening.

I calmed myself before I spoke. "Well, to cut a long story short, my pack have all gone crazy."

"How crazy?" I looked over at Emmett, who appeared to be wearing a stuffed horse around his waist.

"Crazy enough for me to want to join your side. As a wolf, not a cowboy. No offense but, I don't really like wearing Halloween outfits. But they're all running around dressed as Indians, and even Emily has gotten involved. I refused to wear a costume and so now I am here. Luckily my pack didn't break any of my bones as they dragged me around the forest and started wrestling me. I'm lucky to be here with my life." I started showing them the newly healed cuts that covered my arms.

"Let us council." Emmett sounded scarily like that Aro person from when had had to protect Nessie.

All of the Cullen's then gathered into a circle and started to whisper so low that I couldn't hear them. Then after a few seconds had passed, they all stood back and nodded their heads.

"The decision has been made!" Emmett was still being overdramatic. "Sam Uley!" I scared by the way he said my name and then pointed at me ominously. Every other face in the room was serious. Then Emmett came over and started shaking my hand. "Welcome to the Cullens!"

"So how many of the wolves are involved?" Carlisle asked me.

"Paul, Jared, Jacob, Seth, Leah, Quil, Embry, Colin, Brady, Emily, Kim, I think they dressed up Claire and a few others." I sat down and rubbed my temples.

"We're already out numbered. Hmmm...Let me add this to our fact file." I looked curiously at Jasper.

"Fact file?"

He shook his head at me as if it were obvious. "I used to be an army Major. It's the way I do things. And before you can ask, it was the Civil War."

Suddenly there was a loud beeping coming from outside. Alice ran out to get something. She returned with a bag containing...

"The guns have arrived people!" Alice started handing everyone guns and she even gave one to me.

As soon as Emmett was given his gun, he pointed it at Edward and before Edward could move, he shot it. There was a stunned silence. Edward had fallen behind the sofa.

"Emmett, how could you shoot your own brother?!" Esme walked over to Emmett and smacked his arm.

Just then, Edward rose from behind the couch. With a suction cup stuck to his nose. The guns only had section cup bullets. Not that Edward would have been hurt anyway, but still.

Alice had her hands on her hips. "Do you really think that I would be stupid enough to give Dopey here," She jerked a thumb at Emmett, "A real gun?"

"That reminds me, Sam needs a codename!" Nessie quickly diverted the conversation away from the shooting of her father.

"I have one!" Emmett stood up again. "How about: Hound Dog?"

We all shook our heads. I raised my hand. "How about: Alpha?"

"That's a great one Sam." Nessie was surprisingly friendly considering the fact that I had been all up for killing her before she was born.

Jasper held up his hands to get our attention. "Right, now that that is sorted, we can get back to business..."

_Meanwhile in La Push..._

Bella POV

"He's a rotten traitor!" Paul was expressing his anger in his usual way: shouting it so loud that I think people all across Seattle must have gone deaf.

"Calm down Paul. We still outnumber them." Emily was making more cookies. Was that this woman ever do? Make food for the pack?

I was still free but I had to of the pack that I didn't know on either side of me, making sure that I didn't escape. I sitting, with my arms folded, looking to the world like I was having a temper tantrum. But really I was plotting a way out of here. I was having no luck with it so far.

"Come on, Bella. Have fun!" Jacob sat next to me on the sofa and I sent him a death glare.

"I don't WANT to have FUN." I hissed at him, not meeting his eyes.

Soon after the awkward silence that followed, Jacob left. I felt something hit the back of my head. I reached back and pulled a suction cup arrow from my hair. I turned around and glared at Seth who had short it out of his bow. He smiled sheepishly and waved. I made the gesture that told him 'I'm watching you' and I sat back to continue enduring the torture that was hanging out with giant wolves that had kidnapped you. Oh the joy. Such an average life I lead, I'm married to a vampire, I'm a vampire and so are the rest of my family, I have a vampire-human hybrid for a daughter and my (ex)best friend is a shape-shifter. Yep, perfectly normal.

As the hours rolled by, the pack continued to argue over how big of a traitor Sam was. But suddenly, there was the sound of gun shots and hooves. I shot out of my seat and I ran to the window to inspect the surrounding forest. I saw a flash of bronze as my husband ran around, with our daughter in his back. I wanted to do a victory dance, they were here!

Edward POV

I ran over to Emmett and shut off the stereo that he had brought. It was playing the sound of horses and gun shots. It was giving away our position. He looked at he annoyed, but he said nothing.

_Daddy, can I get off of your back now?_

Nessie was sounding bored, but I wasn't letting her out of my sight. I didn't trust those wolves, not one little bit.

I shook my head after Nessie repeated her question. Nessie was annoyed with me, but I ignored her. We had a job to do. We had to get Bella back.

We were going in...

A/N: Thank you everyone who reviewed! I love Love LOVE them!

Next chapter may take a while, as I'm going back to school tomorrow but I will try and be as quick as I can!

Holly xxx


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